.....::..And now that *you're near....::... .....everything is different, everything so different.... ::i know i'm not the same, my life has changed..::.. i wanna be with you.. i wanna be with >you...
xDiViNe_EniGmAx
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Name: Teresita
Country: United States
State: nU JeRu Bi0Tch
Birthday: 10/17/1985
Gender: Female


Interests: BEing a WiErDo!...i like making weird sounds..*BaKeRrTT*...lol..i'm an analyzer-no question goes unanswered..I'm a dreamer fosh0.. countless reveries within countless reveries = ..ohh the possibilities... yet, still wanting to see the World in it'S UtMosT REALiTY!
Expertise: stalker..lol.. SIkE..nah.. just being a 1oo% Tro0 Friend...yo0 know i got chu playa!..lol..it's disgusting how much i lovf youu.........
Occupation: Marketing
Industry: Business


Message: message me
Website: visit my website
AIM: xxswtenigmaxx


Member Since: 2/2/2003

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Thursday, April 03, 2008

My days, my life..Worth every Damn Second..

it's been a ROLLER COASTER of a life.. I dont know how to describe it in a nutshell.but i'll try..

after graduation, went on the Truth tour, visited 35 cities, 20 something different states, slept on a tour bus with 7 other people, got my nose pierced, cut my hair and donated to locks of love, after tour, flew out to LA on vacation, and after 3 days decided to just NOT come back.lol, found an apartment, bought a car for the first time, got a job all through Craig's list, was about to live with this El Salvadorean family with 2 kids (they were cute, but nah) and at the last minute on the plane to Jerz for Christmas break, found an apartment and paid for rent before looking at the place (yeah, major instinctive decision. roomies coulda been axe murderers maybe),  decided to change my career COMPLETELY from my double major in Business Marketing and Management with a minor in Communication Studies, now going to school for Nursing, am a full time student again, plus working full time hours with 2 jobs in Public Relations and in Healthcare,  pretty much living two COMPLETELY different lives at the same time, got Accepted to an accelerated 12-month BSN Nursing Program..and waiting to come back home..

 and the rest is still unwritten. ...

in the short 22 years of my life, I believe I've accomplished SOO much, and NOT ready to stop! This is JUSt the beginning. This is where it all Begins!
I've been a Salutatorian, a straight-A student, a youth for Christ, a president of a cultural organization,a forever member of an Honor Fraternity, an intern for Atlantic Records label president, met all different celebrities in music today, an intern at the Regis & Kelly show, met more great talent, a student leader, didn't have to pay for school, was the senior speaker for the class of 2007, spoke in front of 4,000 graduates and their families, danced in front of crowds of people, played background on sets, was an audience member for Game shows, promoted alcohol at clubs, gave back to charity, travelled across the United States, visited other countries, scuba-dived Caribbean waters, rode through the ghettos of the Philippines in a jeepney,walked through Dominican Republic Caves, watched a sunset  in Puerto Rico,  met amazing people along the way, met Not-so amazing people along the same way, lived on my own independently on the other coast of the country, realized the struggles of independence,  got towed twice in ONE damn month, found 2 fibrocystic cysts on my left chest, met a few good men, met even better girls for life, enjoyed nightife on the West Coast (aint Nothing compared to NY =P), 
I enjoy the sun, and embrace the moon..my days//mylife// is worth every second...

There is nothing wrong with being proud of the person you are, the person you have become. Without this, I would not be me. This is who I am, and I am Damn Proud of it!.. I've become stronger, wiser, sexier, more open, more honest, more me.. and this is exactly what I wanted, exactly what I needed....

Take a moment, and ask yourself if you are happy where you are standing.. and if not...well in the kind words of Ludacris...then MOVE,bitch..

*^_^*

 


Sunday, March 16, 2008

psalm 142

I just picked up the Bible today and just opened the book and read whatever it happen to open to..
.. Get a lil Jesus in your life..

I call out to the Lord
I pray to him for his favor.
I pour out my problems to him.
I tell him about my toubles.

When I am weak,
you know what I'm going through.
In the path where I walk,
people have hidden a trap to catch me.
I have no place of safety.
No one cares whether I live or die.

Lord, I cry out to you.
I say, "You are my place of safety.
You are my everything I need in this life."
Listen to my cry.
I am in great need.
Save me from those who are chasing me.
They are too strong for me.
My toubles are like a prison.
Set me free so I can praise your name.

then those who do what is right will gather around me
Because You have been good to me.

Happy Palm Sunday..


Tuesday, March 11, 2008

.. and I'm ready to BE me..

Where do I even begin?! What am i doing?! Where am i going?! Who am i?! I start to get sick everytime I think about how many times I've lived and been living for someone else, trying to impress someone else and be the proud product of someone else..22 years later, I still can't say that I am living the way I want to live, I still find myself holding back because of the "what is she going to think of me" syndrome or wait for the "that's so unlike you, tracy" comment.. well, friends...

I need to be who I want to be. Who the FUCK cares what you think, or what you're going to think of me. Let me make my mistakes, let me take my downfalls, allow me to run towards the sun,
.. if your perception of me changes, then apparently you never knew me....

 Who am I trying to impress?! Why spend my energy on other people and less focus on myself?!.. I give my energy away. my time out, my dedication, and the moment I put it all out there, is when it really hits me, and this is where I grow the most, and realize that I need to stop spending time worrying about what you think, and appreciate the woman I stand before every day in the mirror. I am at that point where I can let it out and be free. free to be me. No regrets. never regrets. It can be a cruel world out there, but world, I deserve your time. I deserve your energy, so take a few seconds to recognize my existence and allow me to grow..allow me to be the imperfect, impulsive, sinner that I am.. yes, I am not perfect, and I accept that.. I am who I am, and I do what I need to do to be the beautiful, wiser, and STRONGER woman I see in me.... I know I can.. and I will...just watch me..

Even when I'm a mess..

I still put on a vest..

With an S on my chest..

Oh yes,


I'm a Superwoman...

 

I've come a long way.. and believe you me.. this is just the beginning....


Friday, March 07, 2008

...:::I'm Not Perfect:::...


Friday, September 01, 2006

i can't stop writing..

this is my only safe haven... my only ventilation...

i can't stop writing.. it's the only recollection i'll have of forgotten memories and miscellaneous instances that are usually overlooked 2 seconds after it has occured.. it's the only escape I have of the reality that eludes me..of the space between .. of the blank thoughts ... of the wild reveries.. of the motor that runs quicker than my mouth.. and better through my fingers..

i can't stop writing..people are harder to talk to because they've got their own problems.. their own lives, their own writings on their walls.. THis is the only way to relieve the stress without placing it onto another person's shoulders.. this is the only means of getting towards the next day and to learn from the days passed.. this is the only form of getting through the day .. no turning back.. you can look.. but no longer touch.. u know what I mean.

I can't stop writing.. this is the recollection of my life.. the record of the life God blessed me with.. the only one I live.. the only one I choose to live.. if I even had a choice to begin with.. this is the story of my life.. the life I have discovered as extraordinary.. even for a small city girl... the life that includes more than just me in here, and expands to more than 6 degrees.... the life..

...the life I can't stop writing about....



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